Pumpkin "Loaf"

There was a time when I would buy a Starbucks pumpkin loaf piece every week and SAVOR. EVERY. BITE.

I even had a method.

First, I'd eat the corners and the edges along the sides and bottom.  These were good, but they were not the best parts.  They are sort of like the lights dimming before a good theater show.

Then, slowly, eat the tender center of the loaf, where it's almost gooey and magically fudgy.

The finale, of course, is eating the top crust, whose moisture was maintained by the crunchy pepitas.  Pepitas=fireworks in this finale.  Little pops of salty goodness to counter the spicy sweetness.

What?  I'm the only one who did that?  Well, y'all are missing out.

In keeping with the MASSIVE amount of pumpkin I had remaining from last year's pumpkin roasting (and in a desperate attempt to justify another roasting this year), I took a crack at this pumpkin bread recipe from sparkpeople.  Suffice to say, I should have read the comments first.  The batter was watery, the comments reflected the product was more custardy... so I doubled the protein powder, added in some almond meal, adjusted my sweetener/liquid components and made a wish on the pumpkin loaf fairies.  Thankfully, they were listening:-)

Notes: It is still REALLY RUNNY BATTER so I went with using it in a 9X13 pan as recommended (yet the photo is clearly of a loaf, liars liars....), making this look more like sheet cake than a loaf.  Whatevs.  That meant also that pepitas were less possible at the beginning of baking-- they would sink.  If you want to add them as an upper crust, do so about halfway through.

1 can pumpkin (or about 2 cups of your own puree)
1 c protein powder
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp vinegar
2 c almond meal
1.5  c almond milk
5 eggs
12 packets purevia (I go light on sweetener; normal recipe calls for 3/4 c agave syrup, do what you want)
3 T pumpkin pie spice (or more to taste)
1/2 c pepitas (for topping)

325. Mix (except pepitas). Pour. Bake 60ish min or until passes the toothpick test. Cool.  Ice.  Eat.

If no pepitas, use a cream cheese icing if you'd like (and you'd like).  Heck, use it under the pepitas. Yes.  That.  Do that.

Cream cheese icing (SUPER EASY, not even a recipe, stupid good)

1 block cream cheese
1 stick butter
4-5 packets purevia

Soften cream cheese and butter.  Mix together, mix in sweetener to taste.

Nutrition stats:
12 pieces (generous servings!), including cream cheese icing, each:
370 calories, 29 grams fat, 17 grams protein, 5 grams carbs

Of pumpkin bread and being a snotface

Not too long ago, I saw a blog post where someone posted about having made an egregious error while making pumpkin bread.  They accidentally put CUMIN in.  What?  Who DOES that?  Do they not read?  Have they not heard the adage "measure twice, cut once?"

Seriously.

So I dismissed it, clucked my tongue, and went on with life.

Today, I decided to make good use of the pumpkin hanging out in my fridge and started throwing things into my mixer.  I grabbed my spice jar and was generously pouring it in when a pungent, warm aroma rose up to my nose from the bowl beneath.

Cumin.

I kid you not.

So, let that be a lesson on judging others.  Don't.

I fished out as much cumin as I could, recompensed the bowl with some almond butter, and went about my way. Don't tell Tom.  I could swear I got a whiff of cumin as I nervously inspected the bread, but overall it was a resounding success.  A little eggy, but good, moist, and absolutely hit the spot

As for the recipe, I found it a long time ago.  I don't know when, I don't know where.  All I know is that I tucked it away for safe keeping and happened upon it this weekend when I wanted to make muffins or pumpkin loaf with my remaining pumpkin puree.  Plus, it used almond butter, and I was curious about this whole "butter to bread" thing that I've seen lately.  What better way to try than with scrumptious pumpkin quick bread?????

I did some googling and couldn't find the exact recipe that inspired me, and that was unfortunate not only for giving credit but because I therefore didn't know what temperature to set my oven not in what size pan to put the bread.  Oops.  But I made do, put the oven to 325 and cooked it for 30 minutes to start, being satisfied at 40 minutes. 

Ingredients:
1 cup almond butter
3 eggs
2/3 cup pumpkin puree
1/3 cup honey/maple syrup (or be like me and use 1/3 c almond milk and 5 packets truvia)
1/2 tsp salt
1 tsp baking soda
2 tsp PUMPKIN PIE SPICE  (please read the label, for me.  Laugh at me if you must, but laugh while reading)
A handful of chocolate chips

Mix all except the chocolate chips in a bowl with a hand mixer or a stand mixer, pour into loaf pan, toss chips on, bake at 325 for 35-40 minutes.


Using 8 as your serving size, caloriecount.com tells me you get this (without chocolate chips)

Nutrition Facts

Serving Size 1/8 recipe

Amount Per Serving

Calories 253 Calories from Fat 196

% Daily Value*

Total Fat 21.8g 33%

Saturated Fat 4.3g 22%

Cholesterol 61mg 20%

Sodium 332mg 14%

Total Carbohydrates 8.1g 3%

Dietary Fiber 2.0g 8%

Sugars 1.2g

Protein 9.2g

Vitamin A 65% • Vitamin C 2% Calcium 10% • Iron 11%

Nutrition Grade C+

* Based on a 2000 calorie diet

Low Carb Grain-free Pad Thai!!!!

My home smells like an exotic, savory get away.  I just keep breathing deeply and enjoying the joy of my own, homemade pad thai that is low carb and amazing.

Yes, you read right.  Homemade, low carb pad thai.  I used kelp noodles to approximate pho last winter, and they are back to star in this dish.  Just a tad firmer than rice noodles, kelp noodles are a fabulous substitute.  They don't take the prettiest photo, but they do taste delicious!

This is really simple to pull together, too!  It's full of easy to find ingredients, it tastes fresh but deep, and it's ready in a jiff.  What more can you ask for?

By the way, this serves four with big heaping helpings that come out to 6 net carbs per serving when using tofu as the protein.

Ingredients:

Sauce:

1/4 c tamarind paste

1/4 c fish sauce

4 packets truvia

1/4 c peanut butter (not necessarily part of the usual dish, but I didn't have any chopped peanuts to garnish and wanted the peanutty flavor)

sizeable squirt of sriracha

The rest:

giant pack of kelp noodles

3 cloves garlic, pressed

4 T coconut oil

protein of choice (chicken, beef, tofu)

2 eggs

4 green onions, chopped

a few spring cilantro, chopped

*I have heard that you can soak kelp noodles in a slightly acidic water bath for 30 minutes to get them to soften up.  I personally have had good luck just boiling them for 30 minutes.

1) Soften noodles.  Give them a few snips since they seem to be one glommed up big noodle.

2) Sautee garlic in coconut oil. Add protein and cook through. Remove to plate.

3) Toss sauce ingredients in large pot.  Mix until well blended.  Toss in noodles, 

4) Scramble an egg into the noodles by pushing the noodles to one side of pot and cracking eggs into the empty space. Mix into the noodles.

5) Add in protein.  Add in cilantro and take off the heat.  Serve.  Indulge.  Enjoy.

Low carb, gluten-free pizza crust that actually bubbles and chews!

Not 3 days ago, I cooked a dish that just might revolutionize my baking regime.

I know, I know, I make grand statements all the time, but I'm still in that discovery/exploratory state of wonder when it comes to low carb eating.  It's like I'm five years old again and experiencing my first snow!  Every time I find out a healthier way to make something that I had resigned myself to never/rarely eating again, I feel like I have cheated death and gotten a gift from Santa all at once.

Today, it's pizza.  I'm sure you're rolling your eyes.  After all, I have made cauliflower and almond flour and chicken pizza crusts before, and I declared them great, and I still think they're great.  But, they're more like delicious dishes that aren't quite pizza.  This is pizza.

Top: See that gorgeous golden color!
Bottom: Trying to show the crust detail.  There were bubbles, man!

Some people on low carb say "no man, it's the TOPPINGS I loved!  I just didn't realize it until I got rid of the crust.!"  I am not one of them.  I don't care if they have found their true pizza desires or if they are knee deep in denial, I need a crust.

This recipe comes on the heels of that amazing coffee cake, and they share the same secret ingredient: unflavored whey protein.  After seeing the amazing crumb and delicate nature of the bread, I thought maybe, just maybe, this miracle ingredient that provided such substance to the cake could liven up pizza dough and provide the bubbles and chewiness that typifies pizza dough.  It did!  It still needs a little something for moisture, I think, and to that end I added in some olive oil.  I made it without but was comfortable enough with the recipe to post as is-- it was good enough to pass the cold pizza test!  If you try it out, let me know how it goes!

Ingredients:
2 c shredded mozzarella
1/4 c almond meal
1/4 c unflavored whey protein
1 T olive oil
1 egg

Mix everything together and spread it thinly on an oiled/parchment paper covered cookie sheet to as thin as you can get it.  Did I say think?  Cook at 350 for about 10 minutes or until it's browned an bubbly.  Cover in sauce and toppings an cook until the cheese is gooey and you are on your tippy toes waiting for deliciousness.

Sun-Dried Tomato Cream Sauce over Chicken

File this recipe under "things that make you go WOW at first bite."  Really.  I took a bite, lowered my fork, and just stared.  I knew I was in the presence of food greatness.

Moving on to the stuff I wrote before I cooked and ate....

This recipe is brought to you because I made a Costco run.  How I love Costco.  Whether it's the epic mountain of coffee that I somehow manage to drink through in a month, the bargain-priced wine that still tastes respectable, or the free bacon samples, I always find something to love.

I'm sure I had your attention at "free bacon," but the real star of this week's haul was the rotisserie chicken.  At $4.99 a chicken, it's a steal.  The meat is succulent, and it's a pretty hefty bird.  I actually pulled the bird apart and weighed all the meat; the final yield was 2.25 pounds, and I stole a few bites along the way before the weighing.  I know that I can get boneless, skinless thighs and breasts on good sales for $2/lb, but there's so much liquid that is given off while cooking that I'm not sure I don't come out ahead with the pre-roasted bird.  I kept the bones, skin and juices for broth, too.  Just so much savory goodness! The clincher for me is that on my most tired night, I can still drag my butt into the store to pick up a chicken and a bag of salad.  $8 later, we have AT LEAST 4 healthy meals for the two of us, and we stay on track with budget and diet.

The chicken is delicious on its own (let's not pretend I don't just eat it straight out of the carton some days), but today I decided to step it up a bit. I've written about Bella Sun Luci tomatoes before (gee, also from Costco), and I continue to love them.  They have so. much. flavor., and, like the pesto in my last post, they come with seasoning already built in.  I always add a little extra garlic--because, well, garlic-- but otherwise, the flavor comes from simple, good ingredients that you might have in your pantry!  You could probably even pull off using tomato paste instead of sun dried tomatoes if that's what you're working with.  The wine can of course be subbed out for stock, but it adds a nice complexity and deep undertones that worked well with the tomatoes.  Just sayin'.

Ingredients:
2 c chicken, cooked through and roughly shredded or chopped
2 cloves garlic, crushed
1 T oil
1/2 c chardonnay
1/2 c heavy cream
8 sun dried tomato halves

1) Put garlic and oil in saucepan.  Cook over medium until garlic is tender.   If you like garlicky goodness, leave garlic in.  If you want a more subtle hint, take it out.
2) Add chardonnay and tomatoes and cook the alcohol off.
3) Add cream and cook until it coats the back of your spoon.
4) Use immersion blender to puree the sauce, or cool a bit and then carefully use food processor or blender.
5) Add in chicken and mix around.

Serve over something wonderful like pureed cauliflower.

Nutrition Facts

Serving Size 217 g (1/2 recipe)

Amount Per Serving

Calories 442 Calories from Fat 215

% Daily Value*

Total Fat 23.8g 37%

Saturated Fat 9.2g 46%

Trans Fat 0.0g

Cholesterol 149mg 50%

Sodium 132mg 6%

Total Carbohydrates 5.9g 2%

Dietary Fiber 0.8g 3%

Protein 42.0g

Vitamin A 12% • Vitamin C 22% Calcium 5% • Iron 9%

Nutrition Grade B-

* Based on a 2000 calorie diet

pesto cheese dip

I feel like I'm letting you in on two foodie finds at once.  First find: USE BELL PEPPERS FOR CHEESY DIPS!!!!   Really, I love French bread and tortilla chips, I do... but besides this low carb business, I actually prefer bell pepper dippers. They are substantial enough to stand up to the heartiest dips (see above photo of gloriousness) but also provide a crisp refreshment to complement the fatty cheese.

Let me be clear, I have nothing against fatty cheese.  It is one of the loves of my life.  It just needs a little balancing, esp when it is stringy melty goodness.

The second find is this recipe, which was inspired by this white pizza dip.  While her dip looks phenomenal, I wasn't invested in roasting tomatoes, and I love pesto for being a multi-layer food all by itself.  Who needs to add in extra herbs, nuts, cheese when it comes in a perfectly balanced flavor-packed combo?

This is some scrumptious party food, whether you are a party of two or a party of twenty.  Just don't forget to scale up--it goes quickly!

Ingredients:
2 blocks cream cheese, softened
8 oz shredded mozzarella
8 oz  shredded provolone
1/4 c pesto

Mix everything together and bake at 350 for 25ish minutes or until top is bubbly.

Cheesy beefy mac... without the mac

I LOVE one-pot meals.  Cleaning is easier, serving is easier, and somehow they tend to make enough to feed an army.  Plus, they are often creamy, gooey, soul-feeding comfort food.

This one is no exception.  A big hug of a meal.

I had been craving something cheesy and casserole-y, and I kept circling back to the idea of a cheesy mac recipe with cauliflower as the macaroni.  This, friends, is one of those dishes we ate four days in a row and were still sad to see end.  As an added bonus, cauliflower seems to be the ideal base for other virtues than its vegetableness.  Whereas macaroni can easily overcook in a casserole, cauliflower maintains its integrity.  It does not fold under heat and pressure!

Please forgive that joke.

And go make yourself some deliciousness.

Ingredients:

2 lbs ground beef
1 T smoked paprika
2 cloves garlic, pressed

1 head cauliflower, chopped
1 c heavy cream
2 oz cream cheese, pinched or sliced into small cubes
2 T dijon mustard
2 c shredded sharp cheddar

1) Cook beef with paprika and garlic.
2) Steam cauliflower in microwave or cook on stovetop until crisp-tender.  For me, this is 5 minutes in the microwave.
3) Meanwhile, bring cream to a simmer in LARGE pot.  Either pinch cream cheese off the block in tiny pieces or cut into tiny cubes.  Whisk into cream.  Add mustard.  Mix in shredded cheddar until you have most awesome sauce EVAR.
4) Mix in cauliflower and ground beef, then pour into a 9X13.  Bake for 20 minutes at 350.

Makes 8 scrumptious and filling servings

Nutrition Facts

Serving Size 216 g

Amount Per Serving

Calories 400 Calories from Fat 197

% Daily Value*

Total Fat 21.9g 34%

Saturated Fat 11.9g 59%

Trans Fat 0.0g

Cholesterol 147mg 49%

Sodium 409mg 17%

Total Carbohydrates 4.2g 1%

Dietary Fiber 1.3g 5%

Sugars 1.1g

Protein 45.0g

Vitamin A 20% • Vitamin C 27% Calcium 16% • Iron 124%

Nutrition Grade B+

* Based on a 2000 calorie diet

Foray into whey protein... and BEST coffee cake ever!

Aerial view of what is pure deliciousness.

Look at that!!! Can't you see the "delicate crumb?"

It's been a while, I know.  There's this thing called life, you see.  Life included lots and lots of school this semester, but with college physics in the rearview (buh-bye!), I hope to have some more time and energy for creative outlets like baking and writing.

I'm sure you're just so impacted by my return.  I'll give you a moment to collect yourself.

Tom and I are both a bit under the weather, which has been AMAZINGLY RAINY!!!!  I am exuberant about the rain but less so about our sniffles.  And when I am sniffly, I don't usually want to bake anything difficult, but something kept whispering to me while I read Carolyn's cinnamon roll coffee cake post.  I could smell it through the screen, and it seemed like I could put it together in the time it takes to brew coffee. The one quirk?  Many of her recipes include whey protein.

Whey protein.  In baked goods.  What?

At first, I scrunched my nose in suspicion.  I mean, I love a good isopure shake after a workout... but protein powder in baked goods?  Reeeeaaaallly?

But think about it.  Gluten is a protein.  It is the gooey goodness that makes baked goods and pasta tender and chewy.  It's not too much of a stretch to think that whey protein would have similar properties.  Perhaps, then, whey protein is not just for meatheads but also for bakers.  With that conviction, I whipped up this coffee cake in no time. And oh. my. gosh.  It was perhaps the best coffee cake I have EVER had.  It rose well and was super moist throughout.  I think I have found my new base recipe for cupcakes!

The recipe creation is absolutely Carolyn's, but I'm a lazy pants and skipped a few steps.  I also don't have Swerve in the budget right now, so I subbed in generic splenda from kroger to the level of sweetness I prefer.  I'm sure hers was better, but, again, lazy pants.  Here's what I did.

Ingredients:
3 cups almond meal or flour.  (I used half of each; Trader Joe's meal is a bit cheaper than almond flour)
1/4 c whey protein
2 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp baking soda
1/4 tsp salt
1 T cinnamon (always good to have it everywhere!)

1/3 c splenda
1/2 c butter, melted
1 tsp vanilla
3 large eggs
1/2 c almond milk

1) Combine 1st group ingredients in one bowl.
2) Blend second group ingredients in another bowl.
3) Add 1st group to second group in 2 batches, mixing along the way.
4) Pour 1/2 batter into greased 8X8.  Sprinkle a layer of cinnamon. Pour remaining batter. Sprinkle layer of cinnamon.
5) Bake at 325 for 35 minutes.

If you want icing.... melt 3 T cream cheese and mix with 1 packet truvia and 1 T cream.

Nutrition info based on 16 pieces, icing included.

Nutrition Facts

Serving Size 49 g

Amount Per Serving

Calories 207 Calories from Fat 162

% Daily Value*

Total Fat 18.0g 28%

Saturated Fat 6.6g 33%

Trans Fat 0.0g

Cholesterol 53mg 18%

Sodium 140mg 6%

Total Carbohydrates 5.2g 2%

Dietary Fiber 2.6g 10%

Sugars 1.1g

Protein 8.5g

Vitamin A 5% • Vitamin C 0% Calcium 10% • Iron 6%

Nutrition Grade C-

* Based on a 2000 calorie diet

Pho realz, yo

Sorry about the title.  I had to.

Pho is a DELICIOUS Vietnamese soup.  A few years ago, I was first introduced to this lovely treat in Boston while out with college friends.  We had marched in a parade and were frozen to the core, and one of our crew recommended a local eatery.  I had no idea what pho was or if I even liked Vietnamese cuisine, but I knew that soup=warmth for your belly, so I was game.

I fell in love that day.

Pho has a beautiful flavor profile-- the broth includes star anise, which is one of my favorite spices.  The soup contains a HUGE amount of rice vermicelli, but you mix in your own quantities of basil, cilantro, spicy peppers, bean sprouts and hot sauce at the table.  It makes for a meal that is communal yet individualized, and I was hooked from first bite.  Plus, you can often get some Vietnamese coffee, and that's worthy of a whole 'nuther post on another day.

Fast forward to the last two years, when I taught all week and recovered all weekend. On many blustery Sundays in the fall/winter, Tom and I would take refuge in one of the local pho houses, relishing the exotic aroma of the broth and the minty, crisp bite of basil and mixing in as much sambal as we could handle.

Pho has a special place in my heart.

And now, it has a special place in my diet!

Tom and I had experimented a little with kelp noodles, and we both liked them.  I read that if you boil them for 45 minutes, they soften up enough to be "real" noodles.  I decided to be brave and try to make pho-- so, off to H Mart!  As a lazy pants, I looked for a spice satchel to add to broth but found none.  Instead, I found a broth packet.  Msg, blah blah, but I was willing to try it.  And friends, it was perfect.  I also picked up some herbs, jalapeno and the biggest pack of sea tangle noodles available.  This took about 5 minutes to put together (not counting the boiling time).  Great for a tired day's meal (and about 3 more meals).

Ingredients:
giant pack o' kelp noodles
1 pack pho broth
water to amply cover kelp noodles
cilantro, basil, jalapeno, bean sprouts, sauce
thinly sliced beef.

1) Boil the noodles.  Boil them some more.  We boiled 30, added spice packet, boiled 15 more.
2) Put thinly sliced beef in bowl (the broth will cook it; if you are squeamish, cook beef in pot before serving)
3) Pour broth over beef, scoop in noodles to taste.
4) Personalize your bowl with cilantro, basil, bean sprouts, spicy peppers and hot sauce.

The genius?  The carb count is pretty dang low.  We got about 2 carbs from our broth, 1 from the veggies and hot sauce.

Carnitas

 Here's how it looks in context of a meal

Here's how it looks when you are getting the crispy goodness and over-stir.

This is perhaps the easiest meal/meat preparation ever, and it is so versatile.  Add some salsa and turn it into a burrito bowl.  Cover with avocado slices.  Add to fried eggs.  Use in fried (cauli)rice.  It is just plumb good.

Folks, it's not for the faint of heart.  It's pork that cooks until the fat is rendered... and then it fries itself in that fat.   The great news is that it is very flavorful, very easy, and feeds a crowd (or two hungry people for a week).  The other great news is that I am continuing to lose weight and gain endurance while eating high fat/low carb, so I'm feeling that the fattiness here is acceptable.

2 lbs pork butt/shoulder, cut into 2" chunks
1/2 c citrus juice of choice  (I used lime and orange in equal parts)
time (no really, commit to 3 hours in the kitchen)

Put meat chunks in pot.  Pour in citrus juice.  Add water until it covers pork.  Turn on the heat and simmer until the water cooks off.  Continue to stir and fry in its own juices (YUM) until you get a crispy edge.  Be vigilant about cooking and stirring here-- you want even crispiness, not charred bottom.

I hear you can put the ingredients in the crockpot, minus the water, and then put the chunks of meat on a cookie sheet and broil for crispiness.  I will be trying this.

Nutrition Facts

Serving Size 129 g

Amount Per Serving

Calories 335 Calories from Fat 218

% Daily Value*

Total Fat 24.3g 37%

Saturated Fat 8.9g 45%

Cholesterol 102mg 34%

Sodium 77mg 3%

Total Carbohydrates 1.3g 0%

Protein 26.5g

Vitamin A 0% • Vitamin C 9% Calcium 3% • Iron 8%

Nutrition Grade C+

* Based on a 2000 calorie diet